Hapiness influencers: Beliefs

The bottom line on beliefs is this:
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You either consciously control your beliefs,
​or they unconsciously control your life.

Beliefs exert a strong influence on our happiness. Often they lie deep within our unconscious mind ruling what we think and do. 

People around us often repeat phrases, which we sometimes embed into our psyche as 'truths'. It is critical for us to ba able to distinguish between facts and beliefs. "I am cold" is a fact, "I am unworthy" is a belief. 
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The intention behind some common sayings may be good, but as we outgrow their usefulness, they become a limitation. Take a look at the following and ask yourself:
Do I believe this? Does it empower me or limit me? What is a better belief to have?

"Finish your plate. There are people starving."

Good intent: don't waste food be compassionate with other
Bad effects: conditioned overeating from childhood and detachment from own feelings of fullness; health problems later in life
Substitution: When eating, honour your hunger. Eat enough and be considerate for others by not wasting.

"Money doesn't grow on trees."

Good intent: be mindful with your spending
Bad effects: a scarcity mentality; money is limited and I need to hoard it
Possible substitute: The universe is abundant. Because I CAN get what I truly want, I DON'T HAVE to get everything I want.

"Don't burn your bridges." 

Good intent: maintain relationships with people who may one day be a resource
Bad effects: apprehension to follow your heart out of fear of upsetting someone; not grabbing opportunities when they come; staying stuck in unproductive relationships
Possible substitute: I follow my heart's deepest calling regardless of what others think or say.

"Life is hard."

Good intent: experiencing difficulties is a normal part of the human experience
Bad effects: believing that life HAS to be difficult; "too good to be true" mentality; accepting unnecessary suffering as "natural"
Possible substitute: Life is what I make it. Every challenge is an opportunity for me to learn and grow.

"Good things come to those who wait."

Good intent: it is important to be patient and it is worth it
Bad effects: becomes an excuse not to pursue one's calling with determination; discouragement to act because of how long it take
Possible substitute: I'm responsible for my actions and not the end results. I take consistent action toward my goals and good results will come when the time is ripe.

Some of these limiting beliefs may resonate with you and others may not. There is one powerful word, yet, that can help you identify the ones relevant to you. That is the word 'because'. We use it in sentences or in our thinking to give reasons. When you look at your justifications for specific states or situations you will easily tell the facts from the beliefs.

• Step 1: Phrase a situation or a problem you have and add 'because' at the end:

I am not happy right now because ...

• Step 2. Observe and capture all the reasons your mind gives you:

 ... I am alone.

Implied belief: "Solitude = unhappiness." or "I need a company to be happy".

... I don't have enough money. 

Implied belief: "I need money to be happy right now." or "Money = happiness."

... people around me are not happy.

Implied belief: "My happiness depends on others." or "If people around me are not happy, I cannot be happy."

• Step 3. Identify which beliefs are serving you and which are harming you.


• Step 4. Replace the limiting beliefs with new empowering ones. 

Practice this exercise with major areas of your life. No belief is too sacred to be challenged. Question everything, discard the limiting, embrace the empowering. Observe the changes that happen in your life through this 'belief audit'.

Remember, we are controlled by the things we are unaware of. When we bring them into awareness we regain our power. When we embrace empowering beliefs we can guide our lives towards happiness and fulfillment. By harnessing the infinite energy of our minds we can shape our lives in a positive direction. It is time we master our super power.

​Thank you.

Love,
Marty
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Useful background:
The value of happiness, Happiness influencers: desires
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