When the choice is hard, decide with your heart

Do you know how many decisions does an adult make on average per day? According to many sources, the answer is 35,000.
How many of these do you think are life-changing? The answer is 'It depends'. We know that the proof of a decision made is a new action.
Every decision is life-changing when compounded by consistent action.

​The graph below illustrates this:

source: The Great Choices of Strategic Leaders,  Dr. Joel Hoomans

Hence, it is important for us to make good decisions. But sometimes decisions are hard. The following examples illustrate that hard is not the same as important.

What colour of tie to wear is an example of a decision which is usually not important and not hard for most people.

What we eat every day is an important decision. If we are educated, it is an easy decision.

Whether to stand up and offer our seat to another person in public transport may be seen as unimportant. If we are committed to the welfare of others and feel exhausted at the same time, this can be a hard decision.

Whether to leave a secure and enjoyable job to pursue our dreams amid uncertainty ... It is important and can be hard.

It is always wise to make important decisions in writing and use our rational mind.

​Sometimes, we have done this and we still find it hard to decide. Can you recall an important decision you've made rationally and regretted later? Have you ever said to yourself "What was I thinking"?

Sometimes our decision centre, the prefrontal cortex, gets tired and inaccurate. Can you remember a situation when you were just too exhausted to bother to make a decision? Have you ever said to yourself "Whatever, it's not that important"?

Sometimes, we must act decisively and we don't have the luxury of thoughtful contemplation. Can you picture an instance where you wish you had acted differently on the spur of the moment? Have you ever said to yourself "Gosh, I wish I had done otherwise"?

If you are a human being there is 100% chance that you have been in some of these situations.

Rationality and analysis are valuable tools. Yet, they have limitations and limits. They begin to fail when our ego is depleted. They simply don't work in complex emotional or spiritual situations. Hence, it is important to use the unlimited wisdom of our hearts.

Our heart is the linchpin of our physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

Hence, I'd like to offer you a technique that can help you make quality decisions. It is simple, effective and always available. It relies on a part of our body/mind that is active all the time, even when we sleep. I call this technique:

​Decide with your H.E.A.R.T.

It involves 5 steps and is anchored to our breath.

• Step 1. 'H' - Hear your thoughts 

Awareness is critical to successful decision making. It is paramount to be aware of what goes on in our mind. This allows us to use it rather than be controlled by it.
"The mind is a good servant and a poor master."This does not take time. While the speed of thought is debatable, you can 'spot' what goes on in your mind in a single out breath.

• Step 2. 'E' - Estimate their value

This is about acknowledgment and discernment. Now that you are aware of your thinking, you can assess its credibility. You can choose how much to embrace or discard.
This process also tends to be instantaneous. With maturity, we learn which of our mental patterns are trustworthy and which are not.

• Step 3. 'A' - 'Activate' your heart

You actualise this step at the end of the same out breath where the process began. As you consciously slow down and prolong your exhale, bring your attention to your heart.
This is enough to engage your 'heart'. It is working all the time so we 'activate' it with our kind attention.

• Step4. 'R' - Realise its wisdom

The wisdom of the heart can move mountains but is silent. If you are expecting flashing lights you are not going to get them. The heart's wisdom is similar to the way it serves the body. It is quiet, consistent and tireless.
It can take the form of a subtle feeling, a gentle urge to act, or non-verbal intuition. Give it another complete breath and it is likely to get stronger. You may sense a discomfort about your current or intended action. Your heart is 'telling' you there may be a better option. If you sense a silent joy arising within you, that's your heart's way of reassuring. 

• Step 5. 'T' - Take action

The first four steps are in the domain of being or awareness. The final is in the domain of doing. A new decision is recognised by a new action.
You have awoken your heart's infinite wisdom. Now you have the opportunity to use it. Now you can act from your real core.

In reality, this 5-step process can happen in an instance or a single breath. It is an attempt to describe logically something which is spontaneous and natural. The suggested steps are just sign-posts for you. Your personal experience is the real thing. Practice and you will gain intuitive knowing about this.
Let me give you a real-life example of what this can do for you.

Recently I was supporting a client's discovery and fulfillment of her life purpose. Through our work, she had gained clarity in her vision. Yet, she was uncertain about the next step regarding her career. After we had done the rational analysis she was still undecided about what is the right thing to do. So I invited her, to gain insight from her H.E.A.R.T. following the steps.

1. She heard the story her mind were telling her about the uncertainty of quitting her job. 
2. She estimated that there is value to these concerns as she was a single mother with two children.
3. She activated her heart with a few deep breaths and conscious attention. 
4. At first, nothing seemed to happen. Then a few moments later she started smiling. She realised that during the exercise, her heart brought warm feelings for a colleague. Someone she had not seen for a long time, doing work similar to what she feels is her calling.
5. So, we decided she must take action to reach to her colleague for a meeting. To see what can be 'at the heart' of these sudden warm feelings.

About a month later, during one of our regular meetings, she proudly announced that she'd like to share some good news. She met her colleagues, and he was looking to hire someone as he was expanding his team. My client shared her passion and explained that she'd love to do the work. So, after interviews, she got the job that she dreamed for. 

This is just one example of how listening and trusting your heart can help you make quality decisions. 

So, whenever you face a hard decision, rest assured that limitless wisdom is within your reach. Or literally, within your chest... just decide with your H.E.A.R.T.

Are you ready for a life of happiness, health, and harmony?

You know you can make it happen.
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www.martinpetkov.com